Surely You're Joking (#11): Knock Knock

Knock, knock
Who's there?
The fluid mechanics
The fluid mechanics who?
The fluid mechanics, so they're out today.



Knock, knock
Who's there?
Rheology
Rheology who?
Real?  Gee!  I thought they were fake!

Surely You're Joking (#10): Literal Dr. Seuss

With apologies to Dr. Seuss...

Inspired by this post at Buzzfeed.

Link of the Moment: Business Practices

The satire found here imagines how Hunt's ketchup could overtake Heinz as the #1 ketchup in America. 

Disclosures: The ideas presented in the column are illegal and punishable by law.  I work for ConAgra Foods, which manufactures Hunt's ketchup.

A New Logo

I've changed the logo.  The joke is explained here.  The original post where this cartoon appeared is here. 

Video of the Moment: "Bad Project"

Because we have bad projects after grad school, too.



Hat tip: Carbon-Based Curiosities

'Burn the Place to the Ground'

San Diego-area radio stations will be playing songs from the following list today--

• Burning Down the House (Talking Heads)
• Rooms on Fire (Stevie Nicks)
• Fire Burning (Sean Kingston)
• Great Balls of Fire (Jerry Lee Lewis)
• Ring of Fire (Johnny Cash)
• Eyes on Fire (Blue Foundation)
• Hold Your Fire (Rush)
• Disco Inferno (The Trammps)
• The Roof Is on Fire (Rock Master Scott & the Dynamic Three)
• Burning Love (Elvis Presley)
• We Didn't Start the Fire (Billy Joel)
• Burn All the Letters (Indigo Girls)
• Fire Woman (The Cult)
• Paper in Fire (John Mellencamp)
• St. Elmo's Fire (John Parr)
• I'm on Fire (Bruce Springsteen)
• Fire and Rain (James Taylor)
• Smokin' (Boston)
• T.N.T. (AC/DC)
• Smoke on the Water (Deep Purple)--which is quoted in the post title

Stations will also be playing the Pyromania album from Def Leppard, as well as the collected works of Earth, Wind & Fire and Arcade Fire.  Once you're tired of music, you can read The Girl Who Played with Fire by Steig Larsson or Firestarter by Stephen King.  Don't forget the showing of the movie Backdraft later.

(Surely this is an incomplete list.  Make your additions in the comments below.)

Leslie Nielsen, RIP

Best known as a comic actor in Airplane! and the Naked Gun movies, Mr. Nielsen passed away Sunday at the age of 84.  Many of the tributes I've seen have referenced the Surely/Shirley joke from Airplane!, which was the inspiration for the Surely You're Joking headings I've put out this year.  (I posted the trailer for Airplane! back in February to explain the headings.)  Thanks for the laughs, Leslie.

Video of the Moment: Engineers & Cats

There isn’t much engineering in this video, which is titled An Engineers Guide to Cats.  They do calculate feline aspect ratios and show off calculators, but that’s as far as the nerd-like behavior goes.  (Thanks to SWS for the tip.)

After the jump, one of my favorite videos by the same crew: an advanced guide to cat yodeling.

Surely You're Joking (#9)

Anybody know what this is?

Answer after the jump...

Quotation of the Moment

"Hey, got any gum?"

Norm McDonald's impression of David Letterman (seen on Saturday Night Live in the '90's).

Surely You're Joking (#8): Burma Shave

Polyphenylene
Is tough
To make
So why not
Just depilate
Burma Shave

Update: Original article at Macromolecules [login required]

Update 2: Thanks to user drj1990 for putting this post on reddit.  Only one vote so far; I'll have to try harder next time.

Update 3:
This version rhymes better

Polyphenylene
Is tough
To create
So why not
Just depilate
Burma Shave

Science Headline of the Moment

Monkeys hate flying squirrels, report monkey-annoyance experts - CSMonitor.com

A Pointless Anecdote

One of my old bosses had a particular tic: whenever someone would make an announcment that would require a follow up, he would state "oh," to show that he was paying attention.
One day, I noticed that a particular letter had dropped off the sign in front of our building.  I picked up the letter, brought it to his office and said,

"I have something to show you."

"Oh?" he replied.

"Exactly!" I responded, placing the letter o on his desk.

He never mentioned the incident, and I wonder how he felt about one of his tics being used to play a joke on him.

Bonus Chemistry Joke

The periodic table gets its name from the fact that you have to keep looking at it periodically during a test.

Originally seen in Funky Winkerbean.

Quotation of the Moment

"There's only two things I hate in this world: people who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch."

Michael Caine as Nigel Powers in Austin Powers in Goldmember

Update 2/16/10: the word culture was misspelled in the original post.

Quotation of the Moment: Brain Donors

This quotation comes courtesy of a search on IMDb.com for the word "viscosity."


"No?" Flakfizer doesn't know the MEANING of the word "No!" We're also a little fuzzy on "panaglutin" and "viscosity."


The word "panaglutin" does not appear on dictionary.com, and Google suggests the word "panagluttinin" instead.

Surely You're Joking (#7): One-Liner

Rheologists know that shear forces are not normal.

Obligatory NJ Joke

Q: Why are New Yorkers always in such a bad mood?
A: New Jersey is the light at the end of the tunnel.

(Originally heard on A Prairie Home Companion)

Surely You're Joking (#6): 1st Class

(Another in a series of t-shirt ideas.  Explained here.)

Surely You're Joking (#5)

The latest in the series of T-shirt ideas.